Lyrics /

Notebooks

I had this notebook

It was spiral bound and clean

I would write there all the time

Now it’s just a memory

It cost three dollars

And sixty three cents

But to me it was priceless

And it held me, more or less

 

That old place was leaky

Kept my hands inside my gloves

I pulled my jacket tighter

And I’d write about my old loves

The words I used were simple

Maybe not quite thought through

But they came when I needed them

And they sought to foretell you

 

But it always seemed to fall apart

When the writing was at its best

Pages slipping through the cracks

Who knows where they came to rest?

I’d lost everything I’d found

 

Now it’s a laptop

Sitting, glowing in the dark

With its cold keys of plastic

Or shocks from an electric arc

When did that paper

Become not good enough?

It must have been the 90’s

When it seemed that times weren’t so tough

 

Now it always seems to lock or freeze

When the writing’s at its best

Emails slipping through the cracks

Who knows where they’ll come to rest?

I’ve lost everything I’ve saved

Two Birds

Two pictures of two friends

Two rooms they shared

Too many differences he couldn’t bear

 

Two months spent in debate

Two more in doubt

To finally take a chance and be without

 

To finally walk away from what you know is not right

To finally find a way to say goodnight

 

Two years spent far away

To find the truth

You didn’t find a thing; you lost your youth

 

Two birds fly overhead

Two raindrops fall

To wander aimlessly beyond your wall

 

To finally walk away from what you know is not right

To finally find a way to say goodbye

Epworth

Welcome me back

Much like John Sebastian sang in his song

Don’t pity me, it wasn’t that long!

 

Or maybe it was

Did all this change?

Can’t say I’m wiser, just less poor

 

But more in debt with my own front door

 

Wide berth, tall trees

Just like over east

Epworth

 

Some lives roll easy

When you know what to do

My stomach’s queasy

When I’m stacked up to you

But I’ll leave behind

What I didn’t find to be true

Still there’s a mystique

To this place of my youth

Even my cold streaks

Could not change this fine truth

Where a pine’s a pine

And a dime’s a dime for the booth

 

Still more in debt with my own front door

 

Wide berth, tall trees

Just like over east

Epworth

Will and El

Will is a boy

Who doesn’t ever measure up

When he’s the one who makes the grades

Only a boy

Who doesn’t need this now

Wait another day

 

He sees no reason

 

El is the girl

Who lives upstairs in number 3B

She’s always shy when I pass by

She’s Amelie

And Will could be her Nino Quincampoix

But I can tell they’ll never meet

 

She sees no reason why

To try

When everything is shit completely

 

Will’s not a child

But he’s seen things beyond his years

When dad’s a drunk and mom’s a liar

He wants to scream

But he can’t even speak

He’s on a wire

 

He sees no reason

 

El’s all alone

But she’s got a great imagination

She’s never planted on her feet

She’s Amelie

And Will could be her Nino

But they’ll never meet

 

She sees no reason why

To try

When everything is shit completely

Dear John
 

Let me ease your mind

I know it seems tragic

It’s not by design

It’s only a misstep

Even when we find

Best intentions will be maligned

Dear John

 

When I looked ahead

I saw my rearview mirror

But the words you have said

Are making things clearer

And we’re sure to find

This won’t happen the next time

Dear John

 

Keep your hope alive

I promise to try, too

There’s more work ahead

I just wanted to thank you

I know you will find

Your love will be returned in kind

Dear John

Keep It In a Drawer
 

I've got a little envelope

It's marked 'vacation fund'

I keep it in a drawer with my underwear

And I dream of a place far away

It doesn't really matter where

As long as it's not here

 

I'm writing all these hours

Down on my calendar

Really should be marks of a future plan

But when the floods come I will hide

And push all of my things aside

So nothing will get wet

 

I don't think you get it

In fact I know you don't

You might as well admit it

It's too real for you

 

You speak about the blues

Like they were a friend of yours

But you don't even know what the color is

Or how one might chase them away

Wishing for another day

Keep it in a drawer

 

I don't think you get it

In fact I know you don't

You might as well admit it

It's too real for you

Upside Down

Watch where you walk, baby

My hands are tired and red from rushing blood

Maybe

You’ll see the irony of this hardened mud

Lately

Assurances aren’t there when you mouth around

Debate me?

No tugs of guilt have turned this upside down

 

Upside down, upside down

Our clock is upside down

 

Watch what you say, baby

My ears are tired and red from rushing blood

Maybe

Our work can’t bridge this river wide in flood

Lately

A fool I feel I am from heel to crown

Berate me?

No thoughts to ease will keep this upside down

 

Upside down, upside down

You’ve turned us upside down

 

Watch how you grow, baby

My face is numb and pale from a lack of blood

Sedate me?

I know the world can see we’re upside down

 

Upside down, upside down

Our state is upside down

Upside down, upside down

You’ve turned us upside down

 

You can’t save yourself from me

I can’t save myself from you

I Wish
 

They sent me on my way without a sound

They pushed me out into this world

On this path I go round and round

On this path my life’s hopes are furled

 

These corrective tweaks

I will rely upon

But I wish that you were here for me

 

They told me that it wasn’t in the war

They told me that you felt no pain

On this path I can run no more

On this path patience must remain

 

This is how my friends

Will see my through to you

But I wish that you’d been here for me

Credits /

All songs written by Kevin Carlisle
© 2005 Kevin Carlisle, BMI

Produced and Performed by Kevin Carlisle

Recorded May, 2002 - February, 2005
at Eclectic Electric Studios, Cincinnati, OH (Pleasant Ridge and Westwood)

© 2005 Kevin Carlisle

© 1991 - 2017 Kevin Carlisle

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